I'm back from my whirlwind travels and more doctors appointments. I dread to think how much money we've spent on IF/health investigations if you include flights & hotels etc.. not to mention the doctor's fees!
But. If we eventually have our longed for baby it will all be worth it in the end. So I went back to Dr. S who told me 6 weeks ago that I had serious metal toxicity and that I needed to eat meat (shock!) and stop eating wheat, along with a host of other fruits and vegetables that can make inflammation worse. So I did it all. When I went back to him, he told me he is surprised at the progress I have made. All my other issues he found have disappeared as a result. He tested me for metals, he confirmed that I have got rid of them. He tested me again for wheat - still serious issue with it and he suggested I stay off of it. I have no problem with that, I have felt amazing not eating it. He confirmed that I no longer had any vitamin deficiencies (before my levels of B6 were negligible) and then he said I am going to test to see if you can get pregnant and importantly stay pregnant. I held my breath. I passed. INSERT LARGE BEAMING SMILE HERE:
He has prescribed me a pre-natal supplement, lots of zinc, omega 3 and choline (to make my baby smart, he said). Apparently choline helps with forming more connections in the brain and the more you have the more intelligent you are, so choline me up baby!! So I am officially back TTC. Well I will be next week anyway. Today is CD3 and for the first time in many many months I feel hopeful and positive. I feel that this may actually happen for us. In fact Dr. S gave me a firm but kind talk about enjoying my life and not concentrating my energies on worrying about what may happen but to already imagine my baby in my arms. It's hard to do. I told Mr. T afterward that holding a baby, my baby, feels like a kind of fantasy and when I think of it, I feel like I might as well be dreaming about unicorns and fairies. My baby has existed on that fantasy plain for so long, I find it hard to believe it might one day be real. When I said this I knew it was time for an attitude change. I only began to think like this to protect myself. Now it's time to open up myself again to allow good things to happen. I don't want worry or anxiety to hold me back. Time to picture myself with a healthy baby and believe it can and will happen. It's a tall order. Even Mr. T told me he will be an anxious wreck when (not if!!!) I get pg. I told him we will cross that bridge when we come to it. First we have more important things to do....
I also managed to get all the blood testing I missed out on last time we were back in London. So it will be interesting to see what the results say - these tests are for reproductive immunological issues. I spoke to Dr. S to see what he thought about it all and he raised a very valid point I thought - he said if you have major food insensitivities and you are eating something wrong for you, this will cause inflammation which will initiate a heightened immune response. Now that I have removed this inflammation I will be very interested to know my results from the blood testing and to see how my immune system is functioning. So we move forward on two fronts.
We have the more natural scientific approach from Dr. S - whose protocols have had a major affect on my general health. I have never felt better - so I do hold out significant hope that this will translate into healthier and better levels of fertility. And as a back-up we have done the testing for the reproductive immunological approach so if we ever need to that road is always there.
Now if you'll excuse me I need to have a serious chat with my attitude and my uterus.
Uterus? Can you hear me? We are finally back in business! Don't let me down!
